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Charlene deGuzman says her sex addiction started as a “hunger for love and attention and validation.” For her, the confusion came from misplaced messages about her self-worth. Men with sex addiction are more inclined to “just want to have sex and then move on” as opposed to becoming entwined in the emotional aspects of the relationship, Hudson explains, but sex addicts of both genders need continuous hits of attention and affection-women just go about it more privately.ĭespite the name, sex and love addiction is the opposite of sexy-it is a deeply anguished and often isolating affliction. Often, they don’t get caught until they do something illegal and/or incredibly stupid ( paging Anthony Weiner), which makes the sex addict tabloid stereotype all the more salacious. Male sex addicts are more likely to pursue commercial sex, explains Hudson, so they’ll turn to massage parlors, strip clubs, or online relationships to get their fix. Our society mostly focuses on guys with sex addiction because, well, from the outside their spiraling-out looks pretty juicy. “People become objects to be used and not people to be related to.” “ it’s not really about the person,” Hudson says.
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Addicts tend to zero in on whoever’s available-no matter how married, engaged, far away, or otherwise inappropriate he or she might be.